Just To Make You Smile
I walked into my office, and the first thing I noticed was a Tiffany’s Blue envelope. Curious about what could be inside, I quickly opened it. An invitation to a dinner among some of the most admirable we know and know of. I instantly decided we had to go, and I’m confident you’ll be excited about it, too.
Then I notice the date… TONIGHT! How could this have happened? Where did this envelope come from? Questions for another time. I was still determined to make things go right, so I called you immediately. Your voice is concerned and hesitant because I only call if there’s something urgent or an emergency.
“Babe? What’s happening?!” I quickly assure you that it’s nothing to worry about, but I was hopeful you were up for a marathon, and I was excited about this event. You said “No worries, I’ll turn around and head home now, pick out a suit for me? I want to look my best!”. This is usually a challenge; I am absolutely not a “fashion gay,” but I know what you look great in, and I’m happy to help.
We met at home, and I picked out an outfit. Despite being in a rush, we had music playing loudly from every speaker in the house to get us pumped up and excited. You took a moment to stand in my way… little 5’8” me can’t effectively walk through big & tall you, and I love it. Especially when you use your size to gently force me to stop, pause, hug you, and breathe a deep breath that says, “It’s all going to be ok” every single time.
I put my hand on the side of your face to hold your head and kiss you, and as it does, my whole world stops for a moment. Your piercing eyes looking deeply into mine give me butterflies every single time. We both realized we were going to be late, and our eyes got big for a moment, and we laughed, rushing out the door. We jump in my “space car” (Tesla) that has a “F*ck Elon Musk” bumper sticker on the back.
We pulled up to the event, got out on the red carpet, and let the car go park itself. I walked maybe 30 feet, paused, and firmly grabbed your hand. You snap your head around and see what I’m seeing, my ex. He’s a good guy, and we’re still friendly, but I feel bad because he knows how happy we are, and despite wanting that for him, I try hard not to hurt his feelings. Now, here we are, totally in love. You look like $6 billion, smiling for cameras, and he’s got to see it all on display. The man who can barely say your name has to look you in the eye. I felt terrible.
He kindly says, “You both look wonderful tonight.” I replied, “And so do you, as always.” But it just felt like a cheap “You too!” The last thing I wanted to be was insincere. I went to walk away from this awkward moment, but he stopped, looked me directly in the eyes, and said, “I am really happy for you.”
There it was, the empathy I dreamed of for so long. I was so grateful and happy for him to know that he really was happy for me, even if it broke his heart to say and see. Like the words from the song I grew up singing, “Just To See You Smile” by Tim McGraw (one key song to how I see true love), I knew I had a partner now who always put me first. In that moment, I felt good because I knew he grew to know how to love that way, too, and he’d be good for someone special in a way he couldn’t be for me.
We all walked inside, smiling, and somehow, a piece of my heart and soul was healed of many years of pain, hoping that I had helped him learn “the art of removing oneself from the equation.”
As I always do to reassure you that all is well, I smiled at you, and you always smiled back with the most beautiful smile in the whole world. I love you.
Greysen Paige is a tech industry exec who writes creatively about a future he wishes for and dreams of. He also seeks new and additional creative outlets, reading, studying the magic of life, playing video games, and, most importantly, spending time with family and friends. Find me in more places at https://Greysen.io.
Disclaimer: AI is not used in any of my writing. It is only used when generating art for my stories and will always be labeled clearly.
